The trips

I suppose that the sun here in the Dominican Republic does some substancial damage to the tourists’ brains or the all inclusive hotels are simply full of idiots. 

Why do I think so?

I observe the resort guests, watch what they buy, where they go, what they do and I am horrified. 

First of all, tourists buy whatever there is to be bought. A photo with a monkey – „for you AMINGO is just 10$”. So bring your smartphone, drag your kid, pay 10 bucks and take a photo with a monkey sitting on the arm of your child. 

What about some „cool” Chinese jewellery? Well, the beach vendors will find you and will offer you lots of shitty bracelets and necklaces.

Still not fully satisfied? Want to experience Dominican life? Then go to artificially created parks with gift shops and food courts. Private parks are top places and they will rip you of your hard-earned cash.

Below are leaflets of the most popular tourists attractions near Punta Cana resorts: a zip line park, a dolphin prison and a fake Dominican ranch and house called La Hacienda.


Feel like visiting one of these places? If yes, be prepared to pay at least 100$ per person plus some tips for the greedy guides and drivers.

I know I am a boring person and I can’t have fun so let’s turn a blind eye and say that the adventure parks are OK but I will never understand people who visit places with captured dolphins and make their lives much more miserable.

Here, the people responsible for the marketing of dolphins prisons did something what would never come to my head. They divided dolphins according to their size.

 Want a royal dolphin experience with the mammals measuring 120 cm? No problem, pay 200 bucks and the prison staff will let you and other 9 guys hug and kiss two dolphins for 50 minutes. What an adventure! Kissing and hugging is so natural for dolphins.

 Are you short of cash? Don’t panic! There is a solution. You can join a group of 11 people and one poor dolphin of 90 cm will accompany you for 30 minutes. Gross!

That’s 21st century tourism. 

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